I am currently sitting inside my momma’s hospital room… in the dark… on a chair… just swiping these words onto this new blog post.
It may sound like I am a hater or that I am calling certain people out, but truly I am thankful for all the love and concern y’all have showed our family today. Just keep these in mind for next time you are faced with a similar situation.
First and foremost…
The surgery seems like it was a success. Will know further info… such as pathology results & future plans for recovery by Wednesday. (Hopefully.) But overall, our doctor has assured us that everything seems fine… for now.
But the main reason I started this post was to give some helpful tips & information regarding visiting patients. Many people are uncertain how to go about this delicate step in trying to be a good support system, but trying not to step on any toes during it.
Tip #1: be a visitor with some 눈치’s. What I mean by that is… don’t come early in the morning just to ktfo (Knock The “Freak” Out) . You are coming as a support beam… to be strong for the loved ones. Can’t handle the sleepiness, just stay in your bed. AND be aware of your surroundings. You and your visiting pals did not rent the whole hospital out, so please be considerate of other patients. That means… inner voice. Ka-peesh?.
Tip #2: don’t text/message one after the other. Patients or loved ones can’t possibly reply during that chaos. (Especially multiple texts.) If you must text or send a message, just do it once without a question at the end. The best thing and the most thoughtful way is… is to send an E-mail. This is something patients or loved ones could reply to once they are in the groove of things. And it is more personal and in-depth. (Even when they try to reply back to you.)
Tip #3: hospital rooms do not have group discounts. Please do not bring every person with you… such as your second-cousin, next door neighbor, your dog walker, your produce provider… you get the point. And if you know that other people will be visiting, please come at a separate time/day. The patient needs a lot of bed rest, but if you and your perfect dozen hover over the patient’s bed and keep asking questions and talk about a friend of a friend’s similar surgery, you’re actually doing more harm than any good. This is when 눈치 comes in again… 15minute maximum visit. Obey! Don’t over stay your welcome.
Tip #4: I love kids. They are funny and adorable. They make you laugh… which is good for a recovering patient. But they surely drain you. Please do not go over the maximum 15minute visit with your children.
Tip #5: with medical dramas, webMD, college courses, or past experiences as part of our lives… most of us have declared ourself as medical experts. News flash: doesn’t matter what you think and “know”. If you weren’t in that operation room and if you don’t check up on the patient’s status every 2-3hours. You don’t have the right to pull the patient’s family member aside to tell them your opinion on how things should be done. There’s a team of capable surgeons, doctors, nurses, and technicians at the patient’s fingertips… you be you, nothing more nothing less.
This sounds a bit like I’m venting… I probably am. But these are surely to be helpful. Just being the patient’s guardian has made me very protective of her. & stressed out.
Want to thank all of you who came out to the hospital, for the many texts and messages sent, and for all the constant prayer & love y’all have sent our way. Thank you very much. & God bless.